the journey of a girl who is changing her life
A letter to myself

Dear Larissa,

I hope know that one day when you reread this, you are going to be at a weight that is healthy, and that makes you happy. You did it, and I can’t wait to be you. I’m writing you this letter because there are some things you should never EVER forget, so consider this all the reminders you’ll ever need to never stop taking care of that beautiful body.

When you are feeling discouraged about a mile time, or a 5k time (because I KNOW you will be running some 5ks at LEAST), remember this:         Remember that time you got on the treadmill after signing up for the gym and you ran for 2 minutes at 4.5mph and it took 5 minutes to catch your breath. Remember how embarrassed you were surrounded by beautiful healthy looking people running with ease, as you gasp for air. Remember that. 

When you want to stuff your face at a holiday party with food you know does your body no good, remember this:                                                     Remember when you dressed up for a christmas party but everything you wore looked disgusting on you. You changed outfits for over an hour, trying to find something that made you look cute. You tried wearing 5 tanktops underneath your shirt to try and help with the muffin top. Eventually, you called and cancelled because you felt like a fat, disgusting blob. Remember that. 

New and improved Larissa, I want you to read this list of reasons that 205lb Larissa thinks about on a daily basis that keeps her motivated so that you too can stay motivated to be healthy. 

  1. Longevity. Life, in the grand scheme of things, is short, so every day you don’t take care of yourself, is a day you could be taking away from yourself. Lose weight because life is meant to be lived, experienced, and enjoyed for as long as you possibly can. 
  2. Happiness. When you can’t do things that you want to do because your weight or health gets in the way, it sucks, and it makes you sad and upset. Lose weight so you can find happiness and all that you do, and all that you are able to do. 
  3. Confidence. When you walk down the street and someone looks at you, it sucks to have your mind jump to a negative place about why they may have glanced your way. Lose weight because you are better than the negative thoughts that fill your head, and feel proud to show off the body you worked so hard for. 

To the Larissa between now, and your goal weight, I say this. keep going. fuck the bad days, fuck the orange chicken you ate, fuck the day you skipped working out, fuck the bad week, fuck the plateaus, fuck it all. You’ve beat earthquakes and abuse and 50lbs and everyone laughing at your dream. You beat it all, and you can beat this. 

I love you and I’m proud of you, 


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